Fighting for the Kids
Tips for managing divorce or separation with children.
One of the hardest aspects of counseling children is watching parents engage in long, bitter custody battles. These battles are expensive and exhausting for both parties and are always hard, or downright damaging, for children. Below are some ideas about ways to minimize stress.
1. Avoid speaking badly of your ex.
It’s hard. It feels impossible, especially when your ex is not abiding by this same principle. The reality is that talking badly of your child’s other parent is not helpful to your child. You will only confuse and hurt them by putting down the person from whom they received 50% of their dna and with whom they are likely spending at least some of their time. Follow the old rule of, “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.” Simply smile and nod as you allow your child to talk about their other parent. Go outside and scream later.